Dear Tori,

I am finally in America! There was a point in the last few weeks where I thought I would never make it back, but I'm here now and that's all that matters. I've been back for 5 days and I'm still jet lagged and in a bit of a culture shock. When I got to the San Francisco airport, I saw asians....a whole bunch of them. Then my dad picks me up and the next thing I see is a black guy driving a car. I get home and everything is new, and the first thing I did was touch the new refrigerator for 5 minutes. I go to my old room and see that it has been turned into a lounge room. I didn't care because I threw my stuff on the floor and jumped on the queen size mattress....yes, mattress. I've been sleeping on a foam mattress for the past 2 years and lying down on a thick, padded, big mattress was HEAVEN. I was so oily and greasy from traveling for 14 hours, but I skipped the shower and went to the refrigerator where I ate everything there was. Real ketchup, frosted flakes, granola bars, etc. And then I went to sleep for 5 hours and woke up just in time to see my mom come home. I've basically been eating....mexican, japanese, korean, thai, indian, wendys, in n out, everything. A vacation for me is going to Target or Walmart or Safeway and walk through every aisle and just stare and touch.

The thing I find that I have no patience for is trying to answer questions that my family has about my experience in Bulgaria. I know that PCBG is considered to be more "posh" than other PC countries, but this has not been my experience, and I'm glad it hasn't been. And some family members are very head strong and stubborn and it's hard to explain to them that the situation in BG isn't as simple as they expect it to be. I have gotten a lot of "aren't you glad you're not there anymore" in regards to how I have explained the lives of the people in Bregovo, the roads, the infrastructure, etc. That isn't the case for me. I've learned how to live a simple life. I can't help but getting defensive when I get reactions like this. It's hard to explain to someone who is a family member that I have developed relationships in BG, so much so that I consider them as family also. I guess my family really doesn't understand the emotional and personal impact that this experience has had on me, and I don't expect them to, albeit it is frustrating....very frustrating.

In the midst of all this, X Factor is going on. It's a bit overwhelming. The day after the show aired, I had 500 something emails, lord knows how many wall posts, messages, and friend requests on FB, and questions from my family. But I am very thankful for all the kind words people have had....people who I don't even know. My mom called all her friends, and I feel like people here are now more interested in my experience in X Factor than my 2 years as a volunteer in Bulgaria. There is going to be a party at the house this Saturday, and I know I have to prepare myself and gather all the patience I have to say hi and greet people I haven't seen in more than 2 years. Smisel, get the wine.

My family has been spoiling me LIKE CRAZY. I appreciate it a lot and I am very grateful, but I feel guilty that I am getting this treatment when my attention, my time should be with my students in 2 days. I will bring back so many chocolates for them, just in time for Halloween.

PS: I went out last night. With Nika. All I have to say is bottomless mimosas....things never change in the Castro. I'm here for 2 more weeks. Update later.

OHHHH, can i please just talk about my plane ride here? OF COURSE I sit next to crazy babas on a 14 hour plane ride. And a screaming baby behind me, and a middle seat.....YEAH.